Our little darling is 4 weeks old today!  Since coming home from the NICU, she's chubbed up quite a bit and has been developing nicely.  She spends more time awake now, and we love watching her many, many expressions (this baby's gearing up to have some personality!)  We still can't quite tell who she looks like more, but we think she's a good mix so far! Below are some great shots of the different faces of our delightful daughter!

Sleepy Head

Sweetie Pie

Hungry!

Waking up

playful :-)

angry

Defiant

"Gosh Dad, you're SO embarrassing!"

Comfy in mama's arms

By now, most of you have heard that our baby came a month early, giving us quite a surprise.  But what a joyous surprise she's been!  Like a pair of proud, goofy parents, we've been taking tons of pictures everyday with her, so here are a few of our favorites!

Born at just the right time: August 8, 2011 @ 11:29PM

Because she arrived a bit early, our dear daughter had to be helped with an IV (in her head!  :-(  ), oxygen tube, and a feeding tube.  She was quite the trooper though, and we cherish her all the more for it!

LOVE that squishy face!

Just waking up

After 8 nights in the NICU, we finally got to take this cute peanut home!

Her stubborn face after she's decided she's not eating more.

Doing a little dance!

BIG yawn!

Snuggle time with papa!

I've been reading through the Old Testament some lately, and recently came across the 10 Commandments.  This time, the 10th one stood out to me (shortened by me) "you shall not covet your neighbor's house, wife, servant, ox, donkey...,or anything else."  The other commandments are such concrete, measurable sins: don't murder, don't make idols, keep the Sabbath.  But the 10th is so abstract; coveting is practically a feeling.  And how do you measure it?  Did I covet something today?  Is there a penalty for that?  It seemed weird to me that God would mention coveting among the big 10.

God knew we would be prone to this dangerous sin of coveting.  I remember the time I was sitting in China, having coffee with a close American friend there.  At the time, he was married with two amazing kids, and I was single.  We were chatting about life and making friends there, and he surprised by saying, "Ya know, Curt, sometimes I'm jealous of you.  You can get out and make friends with people here.  You're single and free to stay out late, playing pool and basketball with your friends, and you can learn Chinese faster that way too."

I was shocked!  "YOU, jealous of ME?  You're married.  With two adorable kids.  I eat Ramen noodles for dinner 3 times a week."  I was definitely jealous of him, going through a lonely phase of singleness, wishing I had a companion, and hoping one day to have kids.  We laughed as we realized how silly our jealousy was, and recognized we each had huge things to be thankful for: him for a great family, and me for freedom and more opportunities.

Now that I'm married, I understand my friend's sentiment.  I love Michelle and am so thankful for her, but at times I feel jealous of the single guys who can just go out and chill whenever they want.  And less responsibility!  The grass often looks greener on the other side, doesn't it?

No matter what your life situation is, someone is going to be better off than you.   Rather than coveting, God calls us to be thankful always (I Thess. 5:16)  He knew we would often choose to long for what other people had, while not being thankful for the things we have, but he gives us the alternative of thanksgiving.  We all have a choice today- to focus on what God has given us and be thankful, or to focus on what He has not yet given us, and covet others.  Let's choose thanksgiving!

So having lived in China awhile, I (Curt) thought I would do a quick post with my 5 favorite things about life there.  Then, my next post will be 5 of my least favorite things in China.  I'm going with positives first!  And then we'll see if Michelle will post her top 5's as well!

#5 Chinglish!  Over and over again I get good laughs from the English on signs, clothes, and menus.  At one restaurant, you could get "A bowel of stupid noodles."  Yum!  A sign i saw:"Smiling Beijing Police Happy Help You".  And my personal favorite was PG-13 rated.  At a clothing store once, all the staff were wearing matching pink t-shirts that said "This orgy is just getting started."  Mercy!  I laughingly asked them if they knew what it meant, and of course they did not.  They were pretty embarrassed when I explained!

#4  Knock off stuff.  Somehow, brand new Hollywood movies appear on the streets of China as DVD's, within days of their release in the States.  The quality isn't always the best (often someone had brought a camcorder into a theater, so you may see a head get up to go get popcorn), but you can buy the DVD for $1.50.  I don't bring those back to the States though, as I am certain those are illegal here.  They might be illegal in China as well, but it is hardly enforced.  Knockoff clothes are great too!  I got a great "North Face" fleece for $12!  All the zippers broke within a year or two, and it was not a true "Windstopper" like it said, but at least I have the brand name (gotta keep my image up!).  And I've had that fleece for years now.

#3  The Chinese Language.  I really like it.  It has 4 tones, and so sometimes it's like singing.  And the history of the Chinese language is amazing.  Many of the characters (picture symbols they use, i.e., 我，你，家）have stories behind them.  It's hard to study, but really fun to understand.  Also, Chinese has some interesting sayings, usually 4 characters, that are fun to learn.  For example, "playing the harp for a cow，对牛弹琴“，means to fall on deaf ears."  Or, "if you ride a tiger, it's tough to get down, 骑虎难下” means you've put yourself in an awkward situation, like you're stuck on a tiger and stuck in the situation, and it's tough to get out.  Good stuff!

#2  Old People.  Chinese old people are just great.  In general, they are some of the happiest people I've ever seen.  I love seeing Chinese old people out in the parks early in the morning, chatting it up, learning new dances, practicing kung fu, or playing ping-pong.  I find them to be quite active, social, and in good shape!  Usually they love to chat with me, the foreigner, and are very welcoming.  One time, I was out jogging on a track, and an older guy was at the side of the track, standing on his head chanting old Chinese opera songs.  Impressive!

#1  The Food!  Chinese food is great.  I love eating dumplings and hot pot the best.  Hot pot is where they put a big boiling pot of broth on your table, and then you cook whatever meat and vegetables you want in it, kind of like fondue.  I love cooking up lamb meat, potatoes, lotus root, and tofu in a spicy hot pot, then dipping it in sesame sauce.  Chinese food in the States, especially in the midwest, just doesn't compare.  There are some foods in China that I still won't touch, like the stinky tofu they cook on the streets.  Yes, stinky tofu is the name, and it reeks horribly.  But many locals there love it.  I'm a pansy and refuse to try it.  Also, for the record, I find PF Changs to be a joke now, mainly cuz I know I can get better, more authentic Chinese food in China for 1/10th of the price!

In the last year, I (Curt) have been more hurt by Christians than ever before.  Several times I thought, "How could my brother deceive me like this?" or "How could a sister use us like this?"  If the Holy Spirit is really in their lives, then how could they treat me so badly?  Those feelings of being deceived, used, and forgotten were strong, leading me even to doubt the Spirit's work altogether.

Sadly, this is a common story.  We've all heard stories of Christian leaders involved in terrible financial or sexual scandals that deeply wound others.  Some of you have been the victims of that.  And no doubt you've seen Christians hatefully arguing and churches splitting.  I had seen and heard those things before, but in this past year, it hit me personally.  So how do we deal with this without losing our faith?

First, we must fix our eyes on Jesus, the perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).  Is it Jesus' fault that X pastor slept with his secretary (I see on the news)?  Is it Jesus' fault that Y Christian employee at my restaurant stole money behind our back (personal experience)?  For me, it was healing to go back to the Gospels and see how Jesus humbly and gently treated people.  He is perfect.  It would be foolish for us to deny Jesus because of the acts of others.  Why would I let X or Y control my faith?

Second, we must acknowledge "wolves in sheep's clothing" (Matthew 7:15).  Jesus warned us.  Some people out there will pretend to be prophets, but really don't know Jesus at all.  Perhaps the person that hurt you or hurt me, or the pastor we'll see on CNN in scandal doesn't know Jesus at all.  Jesus says in verse 16 that we'll know these wolves by their fruit.  I'll give an example:

Most people know about the actions of Fred Phelps from Westboro Baptist Church in my beloved home state of Kansas.  God is the judge of Phelps; I am not.  But at the same time, is it fair for people to judge Christians by the actions of Phelps?  As I look at the fruit from Phelps life, I would speculate he doesn't know Jesus at all.  It's a shame how the media is slowly lumping a lot of Christians in with Phelps-like attitudes and actions.  Jesus and Fred Phelps are very different.

Third, we must look at ourselves.  Yep, I felt deceived and used.  It hurt.  But have I never deceived or used anyone?  Am I not equally a sinner as the person who hurt me?  There is a dangerous temptation to pride in these situations.  James 2:10 says, "whoever keeps the whole law but fails in one point has become accountable for all of it."  Moreover, if I look deeply in my soul and the motives of my actions, I find that over 90% of my actions are at heart largely selfish (a lot of my doofusness in interactions with Michelle).  I'm not so great.  Neither are you.  Therefore, as we process our hurt, let's not elevate ourselves in pride.

Fourth, let's look at all the good things the Holy Spirit is doing!  He is at work.  I've lived and traveled to places where I've seen some horrific sin, and sometimes "Christians" are responsible for it.  And I haven't seen the worst.  Nevertheless, the Holy Spirit is at work, transforming lives around the world.  CNN and FoxNews won't cover it, but it's happening.  We're prone to see the negative and blame God, but let's instead see the positive and praise God.  Since the time Jesus walked the earth, many humble believers, through the power of the Spirit, have tirelessly sacrificed for the good of others.

I'll wrap this up here.  I didn't mention forgiving the people that hurt you, because people have written whole books about that.  It's hard, and I'm still working on it, but it's crucial.  So that's a few things that helped me through some hurt.  To sum up: look at Jesus.  He's perfectly good, infinitely wise, and reigning in glory, even when his followers really mess up.

Curt here.  Sometimes I feel homeless.  Not to make light of people who are living without a roof over their head at night, for their plight is much greater than mine.  But our job requires us to move often and stay in places for short periods of time, and it's wearing us down a bit.

After leaving Beijing at the end of 2009, Michelle and I spent 2 months in San Francisco, planning our wedding and getting married.  Then we moved to Wichita, where we lived 4 months in someone else's house.  Finally, we were off to Central Asia, where we hoped to make our new home.  However, a stressful first couple months there made it difficult to settle in.  We didn't like our apartment and didn't connect deeply with many people in our new city.

Four months later, in January of this year, we discovered we were pregnant, and sooner than expected.  Due to our high stress, desires of family in the States, and subpar hospital care in Central Asia (I wouldn't be allowed in the delivery room if we gave birth there), we decided it was time to come back to the States again for the birth.  We are now staying at Michelle's parents' place.  They have been extremely gracious and not overbearing, but it's still a challenge to be in someone else's home.

Where do we fit?  Where do we belong?  Will we ever settle in one place?  We'd love to buy a house and for me to get a stable job in the States, but to this point God hasn't led us in that direction.  Will He?  We don't know.  We do know that after we have this baby, we hope our next place will be home for more than one year.  I consider myself a pretty flexible guy, able to go with the flow of a lot of change, but even I am getting worn out with the lack of stability and perpetual moving.

Nevertheless, there are deeper truths to cling to.  As a forgiven child of God Most High, I have a home in heaven, where Jesus says he has prepared a room for us.  So we should never feel totally at home here on earth.  In fact, if you ask residents of Joplin, Tuscaloosa, Christchurch, New Zealand, or northeastern Japan, our homes here on earth could be destroyed in a matter of seconds.  Moreover, with 9.2% unemployment here in the States and economic uncertainty, many people have very little stability here as well.  Anything could happen tomorrow.

So I must ask myself, where is my faith?  In a stable job?  A stable house?  A stable city?  Or a stable God?  I'm reminded of Jesus' words in Matthew 7 about a house being built on a rock or on the sand.  He's not talking about a literal house; he's talking about our faith.  When the storms come, where is our faith- on the rock of Christ, or on the sands of the world?  My prayer is that we build our spiritual house, our faith, on the rock of Christ, regardless of how many times we move in the next 5 years.

We moved out of U-city on June 30th.  It was a bit surreal, as it was just over 10 months prior that we had moved in.  As hard as it was to leave another home, it was also a joy to look forward to returning to the US.  As I took a final look at our empty apartment, I couldn't help but laugh at some of the "interesting" moments that we'd experienced there. 

There was the first time (of many) when we tried to change a lightbulb and discovered that because of poor materials used in building the apt, it wasn't just a simple act of unscrewing and screwing in.   Let's just say that we've had more than one light fixture come completely off with the lightbulb, and definitely more than one lightbulb get stuck in the fixture.  

There were the wars we had with the hot water heater, which finally gave out one night.  We were simply sitting in the living room when we heard a click and a gush of water come from the device.  Even after we super glued the places where it was leaking, we finally had to admit defeat, leading to...

Our shower.  Here is a picture of our shower:

It certainly looks like a nice shower.  But if you look closely, there is a small tub and plastic cups included.  The reason: we had to hot water; therefore, we had to boil water on our stove and mix it in the tub to have warm water which we used the cups to pour over ourselves.  That has been our showering system since January.  Needless to say, we are quite thankful to be back in a place where we have hot running water available to us.  

As much as this apartment gave me countless headaches and roused feelings in me that I didn't know I could have against four walls, we do appreciate the times we had together there.  It's where we spent our first Christmas as a married couple, where we found out that we were pregnant for the first time, where we came home together after frustrating times at work, and where we spent our first term in U-city.  

On June 30th, we also landed in San Francisco, our new home for the next four months.  As I reflect on the last 10 months, it was certainly a difficult journey, but one that allowed us to be who we are today.  I'm thankful for that.  The next time we move, we'll have a little one with us, and I'm sure we would've grown much and much to look back on.  Praise the Lord for much grace along this journey!

30 weeks along, at the U-city airport, ready to take the long flight back!

About to get on the plane to San Francisco! 

We don't know this guy, but we thought his mullet was awesome and just had to share it!  Enjoy!

We are now officially in the third trimester (Yay)!  Now that we're past 28 weeks, I've been trying to pick up a more regular pattern in our little girl's movements.  She definitely likes to kick in the morning when I'm just waking up.  Curt mentioned that he even noticed my tummy moving while I slept in one morning.  She then calms down just a bit in the late afternoon and wakes up again in the evening, just in time for me to go to bed.  All pretty normal stuff according to the books.  

Since we've moved to our current city, we've found it difficult to find the beautiful around us.  But yesterday, about a 30-minute cab ride away from our apartment, we were really pleased to find the Botanical Gardens of the city, where there was a reminder that the beautiful can exist here.  Among the trees and flowers, we were given the reminder that our God is the Creator of the  beautiful, and it gives us hope to know that HE is able to create beauty, even in this city.  

The random additions to an otherwise natural setting

Us with a bed of roses. 

"The Bump" at 27 weeks

Sorry for the long delay since our last post.  We've been busy with some day-to-day of working and living here.  We head back to the US on June 30th, so we're excited for that.  At the same time, we're a little sad to have to pack up our lives again for yet another move.  After about the 7th time, the routine just gets tiring.  But we are very much looking forward to the arrival of the little one.  She's at 25 weeks this week and kicking and squirming like a mad-woman!  We just love getting to see the effects of her movements on my tummy.  It's the strangest, loveliest thing!  Keep kicking little girl... just not so much at momma's ribs.  ;-)